Navy Seal Commander Rorke Denver changed the way that I handled stressful situations with three words from a keynote address he gave: “Calm is contagious.” Click here to see the clip.
When many people picture event planners they think of a perpetually red-in-the-face, stressed-out person running around with a clipboard yelling at people. I want to propose a different image event planners everywhere should strive for: calm. Calm is a choice. Calm is a mindset. Calm is what you want to portray and want others to emulate. A calm, well-planned event is the kind of event that everyone wants.
Another profound quote from Rorke Denver’s keynote was, “In war, if you keep your head, you keep your head.” In event-planning the stakes aren’t as high, but depending on your past experiences with colleagues and event attendees, you may feel sometimes as though the way you execute your event is a matter of life or death. Your job as an event planner is to model behavior for your team, attendees, and stakeholders. The people around you will mimic or amplify your behavior. What behavior are they seeing modeled? I want to share a few tips on how to remain calm in the midst of stressful situations.
1. Understand what’s at stake.
It is crucial to keep a realistic perspective of your event and different dilemmas you’ll encounter during its execution. Know the importance of all the aspects of your event and what the ramifications are if things don’t go as planned. This kind of understanding allows you to stay calm in stressful situations. In most cases, your crisis is not life or death, so don’t treat it like it is. It is an event—if people must wait five minutes longer because the keynote speaker got sick, that is not the end of the world.
2. Plan for the worst.
A well-thought-out plan will allow you to respond calmly in a stressful situation. Most crises can be avoided and negative results of those crises mitigated with a proper plan. Think through what could go wrong and develop how you will respond in advance. Anxiety, stress, or agitation is usually a result of unforeseen circumstances. If you take the time to anticipate circumstances, you will be able to respond in a calculated, commanding way.
3. Manage expectations.
Proper management of expectations allows you, your attendees, and your stakeholder to remain calm and happy. If there is a probable situation, call it out in advance so the immediate response is more controlled. The conversation could go something like this: “I know we have had 10 last-minute additions to our dinner tomorrow. I have made arrangements with the catering team and florist to accommodate the 10 additions. I have also alerted them that our attendance could continue to grow, so if we increase another ten people we will be okay.” If it is a strong possibility or expectation that you will have last-minute attendees, it will save everyone a lot of stress to plan for extra attendees ahead of time.
4. Take a minute and respond with empathy.
If something takes you by surprise, take a minute, take five seconds, but don’t respond immediately. A five-second delay in your response could significantly change your perspective and attitude. Your first reaction should be empathy, followed by next steps and the solution. A reply like, “I am so sorry that happened to you,” or, “I am so sorry you are disappointed with your food,” is a great way to begin solving the problem and will help calm the individual you’re speaking with.
A calm response, demeanor, and attitude will lead others to mimic your response. Calm isn’t the only thing that is contagious. Stupidity, joy, stress, gratefulness, and empathy are also contagious. What are you emulating? What emotions are people mimicking?
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